Ontario Family Law Blog : Barrie Lawyer & Attorney Brian Galbraith : Simcoe County, Canada Divorce, Separation, and Collaborative Law

We need a Divorce Fair in Barrie, Ontario!

Recently, Halifax hosted it's first divorce fair. It was an opportunity to learn everything you need to know about getting a divorce, and how to prepare for life after divorce. Wow! What a great idea.

The fair was two days: one day for men and one day for women. You wouldn't want to bump into your spouse, especially if your spouse doesn't know you are thinking about divorce, hence the division of days by gender. Makes good sense to me.

Michael Niren in his most recent blog at www.divorcesupport.ca suggests that with the divorce rate over 40% this sort of fair may become common place in Canada. I hope so.

A similar fair was held in the UK in the spring of 2009 for the first time, and it was well received according to article in  The Telegraph. A second one is scheduled for March, 2010. I like the name they are using in the U.K. It's called the Starting Over Show which of course makes the acronym SOS. Very appropriate.

There are exhibitors and speakers at these shows. For example, lawyers, mediators, financial planners, yoga teachers, dentists (to improve your smile), cosmetic surgeons, psychologists, real estate agents, counselors, dating agencies, life coaches and anybody else who might be of interest to people going through a divorce have booths or do presentations. It's a place to get more information, new contacts and get inspired as you begin your new life.

Oliver Moore in his article in The Globe and Mail about the Halifax fair quotes the main speaker at the Halifax fair, Justice Harvey Brownstone as follows:

Mr. Justice Harvey Brownstone, author of Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court, is speaking on both days. He noted in an interview that he's seen first-hand the “emotional carnage” that can result from divorce.

“It bothers me as a judge that by the time we see parents they're in front of me geared up for a fight,” he said. “I have long thought that I'd like to be able to reach them in advance. These people need counselling, they need financial advice, they need help coming up with parenting plans.”

The divorce fair provided the kind of information Justice Brownstone suggests, so people can make an educated decision about their choices. Too often people considering divorce end up meeting with traditional divorce lawyers who simply urge them to go to court.

I believe divorce is not just a legal problem. It has emotional, financial, parenting and many other aspects to it. An interdisciplinary approach to divorce best meets your needs. A divorce fair sounds like it would give the public the perspectives of many different disciplines and professionals which is a good thing.

We suggest clients use Collaborative Team Practice to resolve their divorce-related issues. It is an interdisciplinary approach to divorce. Financial specialist help with the financial issues; Divorce coaches help with the emotional aspects; and, parenting coaches help with the parenting issues. Lawyers deal with the legal aspects, offer their help resolving difficult issues and ensure the resulting agreement is legally binding. It works well. Both parties and professionals agree that they won't go to court and will put all their energies into reaching a mutually agreeable settlement.

"Divorce Fair"... I even like the name! Fairs always have roller coasters and everyone who has been through a divorce knows it can be like a roller coaster ride some of the time! 

So, who wants to help me organize a Divorce Fair for Barrie? 

• Email This
• Print
• Comments (2)
• Trackbacks

Can you imagine receiving a $150,000 per month, tax free? Karen Sala certainly could and sued Keanu Reeves hoping he would be ordered to pay that tidy sum to her. She was not successful.

A recent article in The Star declares that the paternity case against Keanu Reeves by Sala was dismissed by the Ontario Courts. According to The Star, Justice Graham declared that the allegations against Reeves were "so incredible" that no reasonable judge would accept them.  The judge said having a trial would be a waste of limited judicial time.

Karen Sala was seeking $3 million a month in spousal support and $150,000 a month in retroactive child support. She alleged that Reeves was the father of her four adult children.

It is remarkable that she pushed the case this far. DNA tests had been done which indicated that Reeves was not likely the father of the children. DNA tests cannot say with full certainty if somneone is the father but they are accurate 99.9999% of the time. Usually, that's good enough for the judges to dismiss the case as happened in this case.

As Ms A.J. Jakubowska notes in her blog, child support payments in Ontario are not tax deductible for the payor and the recipient does not have to claim them as income. Sala would have been able to pocket $1.8 million dollars per year, tax free, had she won her case.

How is the amount of child support determined? 

Child support payments are set in accord with the Federal Child Support Guidelines. For Ms Sala to have received $150,000 per month, she would have had to prove that Reeves' income was about $8.5 million annually. I guess that's possible...

As Ms Jakubowska, a Newmarket family lawyer, notes in her blog, spousal support is tax deductible to the payor and must be claimed as income to the recipient. So, if Sala had been successful, Reeves would have been able to deduct the spousal support from his income but not the child support.

Certainly there is an incentive to sue for child support when the stakes can be this high but DNA tests constitute a mountain too high to overcome. You can't just allege someone is the father of your children these days expect to get away with it. If you are lying, science will prove you wrong. How DNA tests work is a sample of hair from the father, mother and child are analyzed in a lab. The DNA of the child is compared to the DNA of the "alleged" parents to determine if paternity is possible. Courts like the certainty of DNA tests.  They normally end the case one way or another.

Ms Sala was tenacious. She persisted in court. She lost. Case closed. Next? .....

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Did you make a resolution this year to stop smoking, lose weight, reduce your debt? Or maybe you resolved that this is the year to get a divorce.

The origins of New Year's resolutions, according to Gordon North in his ezine article goes back to ancient Babylon and Roman times about 2000 BC. For just as long a time, people have been breaking their New Year's resolutions.

Anja Pujic in her blog at Suite 101 has good advice about how best to keep your resolutions. She  offers the following: 

When setting your New Year's goals, use these guidelines to start you off on the right track:

1. Don’t be afraid of failure. The trick is not to put so much pressure on yourself that you start doubting your ability to achieve your goal. Tell yourself that this is something you would like to achieve one day. Doing so will make it seem less like a chore and more like a hobby.
2. Don’t put a time limit on your resolution. If it takes one year, that’s great; if it takes longer, then it’s no big deal. By giving yourself a little bit of breathing room, you reduce pressure and stress and make your resolution easier to achieve and more enjoyable.
3. Don’t make your resolution too ambitious. Set and stick to realistic goals because you are more likely to achieve them and less likely to be disappointed in yourself.
4. Practice discipline in every aspect of your life. This will make it easier to discipline yourself to follow through with your resolution. When you feel tempted to procrastinate, remember that the sooner you start working on your resolution, the faster and easier it will be to attain.
5. Take baby steps. You cannot reach your New Year’s resolution overnight so don’t expect to. If you do, you are more likely to become disappointed in yourself, lose motivation and, in the end, fail.
6. Tell someone about your resolution so that it feels real. Even better, find someone with the same resolution and support each other along the way. Talking to someone who is going through the same thing as you are can be a great source of relief, encouragement and support during moments of weakness. It can also help build and develop great lifelong relationships between people.

We normally see a surge in clients in the New Year, seeking a divorce for the same reasons people make resolutions at New Year.  The New Year brings with it a new resolve to make things better in our lives. Clients struggle through the holiday period, doing their best to "hold it together". Nobody wants to be accused of being Scrooge by seeking a divorce at Christmas. So, in January, clients come to our office in droves, wanting to improve their lives through divorce.

Constance Ahrons in her book The Good Divorce says that her research indicates that most divorced people don't regret getting a divorce but wish they had started the process sooner and not "held out".

If you have decided this is the year for you to get a divorce, apply Anja's principles to the process:

1. Don't be afraid of failure. You are not alone. About 50% of marriages end in divorce and they manage to get through it. So will you.
2. Don’t put a time limit on your resolution. Divorce takes time and is a painful process at best. Just take one day at a time. Remember the process goes as fast as the slowest person. If you are the one initiating the divorce, your spouse is probably not there yet emotionally and will need some time to catch up. Be patient. 
3. Don’t make your resolution too ambitious. Divorce is a monumental change in your life. Set reasonable, smaller, achievable goals to keep yourself moving forward to your new life.
4. Practice discipline in every aspect of your life. Find healthy ways of coping with your divorce. Use discipline to avoid falling into unhealthy coping techniques such as over drinking or drug use. Get exercise, eat properly and get adequate sleep. Find a Divorce Coach who will help you stay the course.
5. Take baby steps. Make a list of the things that have to be done, and then break down each item into the smaller steps. Take one step at a time and then celebrate your daily successes. Start with finding the right lawyer (a Collaboratively trained divorce lawyer) who will help you work through the issues. Also find a good Divorce Coach to help you through the emotional journey. That's a good start.
6. Tell someone about your resolution so that it feels real. Most people start by telling their family (brothers, sisters, parents) about their decision to get a divorce. Seek out positive, supportive people in your life who will comfort you when you need it.

I don't advocate that you get a divorce if you have a fulfilling, loving marriage. You are one of the lucky few. But, if you feel that a divorce is inevitable, now is as good a time as any. Take a deep breath, find your resolve and move forward toward your new and better life. It's a New Year!

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

I just read an amazing blog by "The Jolly Mama". It is an amazingly honest description of the emotional struggles of separation and divorce from someone going through it.

The title of her blog entry is "Kubler-Ross and My Life Lately" and here is a quote from it.

What does any of this have to do with Elisabeth Kubler-Ross? She is the psychologist who identified the seven stages of grief, and that is what I have been experiencing for the past year. I don't know if all of my emotions have necessarily been identical to the ones she classified. I've been so angry that I'm divorced. That I have to share my children, and I go days without them next to me. That I tried and tried and tried to be a cool wife and was always shut out. That what was lovely about me, my desire to be a helpmate, was rejected or looked upon with suspicion. So, this is not the life I wanted... but it is the life I have.

If you are struggling with depression or grieving the end of your marriage, take heart, you are not alone. Everyone who goes through a divorce experiences the same grief process. At Christmas and other special occasions, the pain of divorce can be worse.

I am a divorce lawyer yet when I went through my own divorce, it was devastating. I thought I would do okay being a divorce professional, yet I too went through the whole grieving process, just like everyone else. It was painful.

Pamela S. Wynn, a lawyer in Florida, writes a great blog  with useful advice on how to get through the depressive feelings divorcing people experience especially during the holiday season. She suggests (I'm summarizing) the following: 

1. Be your own best friend.
2. Focus on lifting the spirits of others.
3. Integrate - don't isolate.
4. Initiate new holiday traditions.  

I would add to Pamela's list.... "Find and work with a Divorce Coach".

They have special training on how to help you work through the emotional stages of divorce. In our area, we recommend Sue Cook or  Deborah Alton. They are both excellent divorce coaches.

Using a divorce coach does not mean you are suffering from a mental illness or that you are weak in some way. They will not engage you in therapy. They simply help you understand and move through the emotional stages of divorce more quickly. Time heals everything but who wants to wait around! Go see a divorce coach. I did.

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Daniel Clement pointed out in his blog that a UK law firm is actually selling gift certificates for a consultation with a divorce lawyer. What do you think of that? ... the gift of divorce!! 

Here are the top ten uses I have come up with so far, just for laughs, with suggestions on what to write on the gift card in quotes. Do you have any additions?

10. Give it to your spouse who is unwilling to deal with the reality of your separation and is stalling the process. "Let's get this done, honey!"

9. Give it to your lover who has said he or she will get a divorce but just hasn't done it. "Hey, if you love me, you would get this done!"

8. Give it to your sister so you don't need to deal with that nasty brother-in-law at Christmas!!  "You can do better!"

7. Give it to the guy who just took your parking lot at the mall, for his wife. "You can park yourself somewhere better!"

6. Give it to your friend who is about to get married to a jerk.  "Just in case..."

5. If you are single, give it anonymously to someone married who you would like to date. "Hint. Hint. There are more fish in the ocean... including me!"

4. Give it to your favourite bartender or hairdresser. "In case you need some advice too!"

3. Give it yourself. If you are facing a divorce, maybe it's time to get some advice.  "O.K. I had better take a deep breath and get this done!"

2. Give it to Tiger Woods' wife. "Thirteen lovers is too many! "

1. Give it to Tiger Woods. "Sorry... but you might as well get back to golfing!"

Actually, all kidding aside, I like the idea of being able to give the gift of good advice to someone in need. If you are going through a divorce, wouldn't it be nice to receive this helping hand from a friend or family member?

What do you think? Should we start offering them for sale?

Another idea... I think we should start stamping the back of our business cards and offer the fifth divorce FREE!! ...okay... that's too tacky!! But it is funny!!

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Tiger Woods has become the focus of much ridicule recently as a result of his admission to having had extra-marital relations.  One publication suggests Tiger had 14 mistresses over the course of his short marriage. Wow! That's a lot!

Some have focused on Tiger being caught as a result of his use of text messages. This is a fascinating new development unheard of ten years ago. May I suggest the thoughtful blogs written by Dick Price, Ashley Russell and Daniel Clement for this angle.

But my friends all ask the same question: "Why would anyone in Tiger's position do this?" Tiger seems to have it all - money, fame, a career playing a game he loves, a beautiful wife, two healthy children - yet he appears to have thrown it all away with these acts of indiscretion.

Why Tiger?

The answer ... perhaps it was childhood wounds but I don't know Tiger personally so I can't speculate... sorry....

If your marriage has been rocked by an affair you are not alone. USA Today reports that 15% of wives and 25% of husbands have experienced extramarital intercourse. Can you believe those stats?  

I recommend you read  "After the Affair" by Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D. In fact, both Tiger and his wife Elin would be wise to read this excellent book. It could help them answer "why?" It could help you too.

The author suggests that it is possible to rebuild trust in a marriage when a partner has been unfaithful and she even suggests how to do it. Even if reconciliation is not likely in your situation, this book is still worth reading whether you were the unfaithful partner or the hurt partner. If you know "why", you might avoid making the same mistake twice.

Dr. Springs suggests it all stems from child-hood wounds. She says:

... if you missed out on the development of the following critical growth experiences, you may never have developed into a healthy, secure, competent adult:

1. Being safe and secure.

2. Functioning independently in the world.

3. Having solid emotional connections with others.

4. Being valued.

5. Being free to express yourself.

6. Being free to let go and have fun.

7. Living with realistic limitations.

So, essentially, Dr. Springs suggests that your childhood emotional wounds can haunt you in adult-life leading to extra-marital affairs as an attempt to heal your wounds or in reaction to those wounds.

I am over-simplifying Dr. Spring's ideas. You need to read her book to understand her theory and apply it to your own life.

Neither Dr. Spring nor I are attempting to justify having an affair -  I feel it is wrong and tremendously hurtful to have an affair - but rather I am suggesting that Dr. Spring's book can help you discover the childhood wounds that may have lead to the adult indiscretions. She then offers ways of rebuilding the trust in your damaged marriage, and offers life-lessons for the rest of you whose marriage won't be able to recover from the deceit of an affair.

I commend Tiger for taking time away from his career to look deeply at his marriage and life. I hope he reads Dr. Spring's book during his time away from the golf course. Likewise, if your life has been rocked by infidelity, whether you were the unfaithful partner or the hurt partner, I strongly suggest you read Dr. Springs book... and take some time away from the golf course, if you must!

It appears that Tiger is heading for divorce according to US News.

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

I shed a tear and held back a million of them. Have you ever had a moment like that?

Maybe it was when you dropped off your son or daughter to daycare for the first time... or said good-bye on the first day of school, trying your best to show a brave face... or the first weekend with your ex spouse....or maybe when you resisted giving them a kiss as they went off to the prom with a date...or when you said "good luck" as they boarded the airplane for an exchange or to head to university... or was it when they had their first sleep over at a friend's home... or went away to camp for the first time. I bet you've had more than a few of those moments.

It's a time of mixed emotions. Fear - that your little one will need you and you won't be there to help. Disappointment - knowing that they probably won't need you. Sadness - of the pending silence now that they won't be around. Pride - that you have done a good job and they are ready to be on their own.

I had one of those moments this past weekend when I dropped off my son and his girlfriend of five years at their new home thousands of miles away. My wife and I dropped them off at their new home near a ski resort in the Canadian Rockies where they will work and ski for the winter. He is 18 and she is 19 years old.

As you can see from these photos of him, he is no longer a baby.

On top of the normal feelings of a parent saying good-bye to their son, I had another layer of feelings because I am a divorced dad. I felt guilt that his mother wasn't there to say good-bye because we are now divorced. Guilt that he was the child of divorce. Guilt that I wasn't always with him when he was growing up because he was with his mother. I also felt pride that I spent every moment possible with him and his brothers since separation, making them my focus when they were in my care. I also felt good that I had provided him with an excellent role model as to a healthy, loving relationship with my new marriage. I felt happy that I had positively contributed to him becoming who he is today.

Frankly, I could not speak to my wife after we said good-bye to my son. The emotions were too overwhelming.

Eventually, I said to myself "I have a choice. I can focus on the negative emotions or the positive ones." I chose the positive ones. I chose to think about what a great guy my son had become.

Justin is...

1. Caring and sensitive. Justin feels everything deeply. He is the peace-maker in the family always striving to find a just solution and to bring his family and friends together. He has maintained a loving relationship with his girlfriend for over five years in spite of him being only 18 years old because he is so caring, understanding and sensitive. He has many great  male friends too because he is a great friend to them.

Justin is...

2. Resourceful. Let me share a story. On a week-long canoe camping trip , I forgot the cutlery. Justin was not discouraged. He simply got out his knife and whittled a spork (spoon fork) from wood for himself. He made the most out of with what he had around him. This is typical of Justin.

Justin is...

3. Courageous. Whether mountain biking or snowboarding, Justin is always ready to push himself to great heights without being crazy or reckless. He was never afraid of challenges. He has played the violin since he was 5 years of age and never hesitated to perform for an audience. In fact, he played the violin at my wedding ceremony and at the open house of my new office. There is no fear in that boy.

Justin is... well.... he is all grown up now and I am so proud of him.

After focusing on the positives, I realized that Justin had turned out to be a great young man in spite of, or maybe, partly perhaps because of my divorce. Hmmmm.

If you are going through a divorce, remember to focus on the positive. Don't let the little voice of negativity get you down. Choose to be positive.

I only shed a couple of tears when I said good-bye and I held back a million. Then I realized that this was a new beginning for my son and, frankly, a new beginning for me. It was a good thing. He will be fine... and so will I.

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Are you dreading Christmas? Will it be your first  special holiday since your separation?  Are you depressed about not having your children for New Year's Eve, or Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or some other special day. Whatever the holiday, you are not alone.

I remember the first Christmas that my three boys were with their mother Christmas Eve and Christmas day. I cried and felt depressed most of the day. The time seemed to creep by so slowly. I felt all alone and like a failure.

I should have taken my 6 year old son's advice.

A few days before Christmas, he knew he would spend Christmas Eve and Christmas day with his Mom because that's what we agreed. So, he asked me to write a letter to Santa and ask him to come to my house on December 26th instead of the 25th. My son said that Santa comes to Steve's house (Steve is my friend who is divorced with kids too) on the 26th so he was sure he wouldn't mind coming to our house then too!

Of course, Santa did come on December 26th, even without a letter, but I think the message my son unwittingly was giving me was that it does not matter when we celebrate Christmas...lets just make whatever day we have together full of love, gratitude, Santa and fun. He knew Santa (and joy) would arrive whenever we wanted them to arrive. We just had to schedule it.

To help make your holidays special, here are ten things you can do:

1. Ensure your schedule is specific. You and your ex spouse should confirm well in advance when each of you will have the children. If you don't have specific times already agreed, negotiate the days and times as soon as possible. There are too many other sources of stress in December so try to nail down your times with your children now.
2. Don't fight over which days you have your children. Whenever you have them, make it special. If you really need particular days, offer to trade days with your ex spouse or give your ex spouse those special days next year. Treat your ex they way you would like to be treated, even if it isn't reciprocated.
3. Do something special for yourself. I make myself some of my favorite food, pour myself some wine, watch some basketball in front of the fireplace and wrap presents all day on December 25th. Actually, I look forward to my day spent all by myself. I am totally relaxed and ready when the boys come over on December 26th.
4. Support your children having a good time with their other parent. If you need to speak to someone about your sad feelings, talk to a friend or therapist - not your kids.  The children don't need to hear it. They need to hear that it is okay to have fun with their other parent too.
5. Create new traditions. This is a new beginning for you and your children so don't try to replicate the past. Find new ways to celebrate the event. You can preserve some of the past traditions but find new ways of celebrating too. My parents always put a maraschino cherry on the top of our grapefruits Christmas morning so I continue to do the same now. Change things up too... I started singing Christmas carols after our Christmas dinner.
6. Get outside. Go for a walk or ski or snowshoe. There is nothing more rejuvenating than being outside with nature and your family. When your kids are with you, take them outside too. A good snowball fight can really build up an appetite.
7. Give of your heart. If you have just recently separated, money is likely short so don't try to spend like you did in the past. Do something special for the people you love. Maybe you can write a special little poem for each of them or list twenty ways you appreciate them. Gifts often don't have lasting meaning. Can you even list five gifts you received last year or the year before? It is the feelings of love and appreciation that last forever.
8. Stay sober. If you over-drink,  you run the risk of crumbling into a pile of self-pity and depression. Nobody wants to see that and certainly your kids don't need to see it. Have fun but be careful so you can keep it together emotionally, especially during your first Christmas since your separation.
9. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people. If your family or friends are negative, remind them the season is all about gratitude, love and appreciation. Park you own negativity and search for the positive in everything and everyone, even your ex spouse.
10. Relax. Know that in time the holidays will become easier to get through and more fun. Just take a deep breath and get through your first set of holidays. Next year, it will be better. Trust me.

There are several wonderful blogs about surviving the holiday season after divorce. I recommend Richard Sharp's blog, Anne Shales blog, Nancy Van Tine's blog and Rosalind Sedacca's blog.  All have excellent advice for parents who are going through a divorce at this time of the year.

Now, my youngest son is 12 years old and he says the best thing about Mom and Dad having separated is that he enjoys "two Christmases, two Easters and two Thanksgivings!" He says "if you like that kind of food, it's great!" Let me assure you... he certainly does like "that kind of food!"

So make it a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Joyous Kwanzaa or whatever special holiday you are celebrating this year. Joy will come whenever you schedule its arrival. It is up to you.

• Email This
• Print
• Comments (4)
• Trackbacks

Have you ever had someone need your help and you were able to help them? Maybe it was something big like saving someone’s life… or maybe it was something small like helping someone lift their heavy bag into the overhead bin. Maybe a friend didn’t know how to get their little one to sleep at night. Or you gave your son or daughter a hug when they needed it most.

Wasn’t that an amazing feeling? I bet you felt really great. That’s how I feel when I am helping clients through their divorce. It’s amazing.

But, I didn’t start my legal career intending to be a divorce lawyer. In fact, when I went to law school (1986 to 1989) I didn’t even study “family law”. I wanted to be an international corporate commercial lawyer wearing a pin-striped three-piece-suit and putting together the big international deals. My plans were scuttled when I entered the real world. I found corporate law unrewarding. I am not dissing corporate lawyers but for me it was painfully boring. It seemed the only lawyers having fun were the big wigs at the top and I didn’t want to work 30 years before I enjoyed my job. So I searched for something more exciting. Going to court seemed like more fun but when I met my first divorce client, I knew I had found my passion.

You might think it was the court room drama, or the passionate pleas for custody of a child, or untangling the financial webs of a family business that attracted me, but no, it was the crying.

I have clients cry in my office almost every day. And no… they aren’t crying because my fees are too high… they are crying because going through a divorce means their whole world has been turned upside down. They need help.

If you are divorcing, maybe you know what I mean. Maybe you feel the “Hollywood dream” of living happily ever-after has been destroyed and you feel like are a failure. When you hear the phrase “from a broken family” doesn’t it just make your stomach flip?… now your kids are from..one of those. The fear is overwhelming. How will you pay the bills? What will your relationship with your kids be like? How will the rest of the world judge you?

It’s at this point – when clients are feeling their worst - that they step into my office for the first time. “Wow!” I thought to myself in my early days as a divorce lawyer, “What an opportunity. I can be my client’s white knight rescuing them from the despair of divorce!” I felt I could give them the answers they wanted and steer them toward resolution of the legal issues, and into their new life. It felt great. I was in control and helping.

Today, I still feel great helping my clients through their difficult days but now I do it in a different way. I am not a white knight. I don’t presume to know what is best for my clients. Instead, I help them discover their core concerns so they can make priorities and find creative solutions that work best for their whole family. I give them a wonderful gift by referring them to other professionals who can help them such as a divorce coach (to work through the emotional issues), a financial specialist (to resolve the property and support issues) and a parenting coach (to develop the best possible parenting plan). I give them the support they need so they can get through their divorce with the least amount of pain (financially and emotionally). I help them analyze their choices, explain the range of legal results, help them resolve difficult issues and I ensure they have a legally binding agreement when it’s all done. 

One of my brothers is a pediatrician. He says he does it because he loves helping children heal. Wouldn’t that feel good… to help a sick child feel better?

I practice family law because I love being able to help people get better too. My clients may start off crying but in the end they will have closed the door on their past, survived the transition (what I call the "hallway of hell") and they will be ready to open a new door to their future. Wow. I am a lucky guy to be part of that kind of healing… and it sure beats “corporate boardroom boredom”. (By the way, try saying that ten times really fast. “corporate boardroom boredom, corporate boardroom boredom, corporate boardroom boredom….whew).

• Email This
• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks